The Ex Factor Maze

Lordy, I’ve been accused of being caught in the ‘ex factor’ maze! It isn’t true, it is the combination of so many factors that made this a story worth telling, and letting out for me. I’ve no idea who that person is now, and ‘lost’ them long ago. The ‘maze’ was the connection of everything that matters in a life though. As I said before, it was the refusal of any kind of human peace around my work that made it the nightmare it became, but so cruel too, especially with the Half to Full Nelson hurt of it. You just don’t do that to people, or to writers, when their psyche’s are already hurt and fully exposed in having to write a long fantasy book. Authors usually hide the tough bits, but another writer told me a similar thing in New York nearly killed him. A publisher is not and cannot be the Pentagon, and however wrong I went, and why, they went fifty times more so, and said they were wrong too. It was also because an editor I needed to be both a real friend and a human being started going on about ‘our side’, and my publisher in a department tagged an email virtually threatening legal action, just at the point I was trying to let something go. Even when I apologised and tried to explain, voiding all the issues of how an ex behaved and why, a convenient ‘accusation’ was left over my head they now would not even let me speak about. When you have a fighting spirit, that’s a disastrous recipe, but it goes back to the question of who must come first, the editor or writer, and in fiction it must be the writer. But a human being could not have got more lost and maybe it does all require being far more positive about the future, each other and what’s possible now! It was three years ago, though only I’m still picking up the pieces, and it is essentially meant as a Cautionary Tale, not any kind of recommendation for anything.

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